Just so you know, this is going to be one of those pointless, aimless rambling kind of entries that will make you wonder what happened to the last few minutes of your life.

So I haven’t been writing much lately, although it's not for lack of nothing to say.

Forget apples, it’s bananas that will keep the doctor away?!

I'm on the edge of an obsessive shopping disorder?!

Is that Hispanic man coming on to me?!

That man has bigger boobs than I do?!

I know the people with whom I work would rather I was a wee bit less vocal, but I guess I’m not the quiet sort after all. I am, I am not, I am, I am not. Concentration is of the utmost importance where I work and often, it’s quiet enough to hear the rumble of a stomach. Like mine today, after that salad I ate for lunch.

“If we had office music, no one would have to listen to this,” I said to them.

Sometimes my job duties make me go balls-out batshit and the only way to deal with that kind of emotion is a verbal vomit. But don’t cry for me, I’m the employee of the month.

Speaking of which, I can’t believe it’s practically mid-December. And that I got my second holiday gift already: schloads of Giradelli chocolate. Which is great news for my big ole zit, Herman, who's lonely.