My OCD, let me share it with you
Thursday, September 20, 2007, 6:24 PM

I’m a staple puller.

I once pulled a thumb muscle from pulling one staple too many.

So I switched hands.

A quarter of my day is probably spent just pulling staples from pages. Sometimes doing this drives me nuts because it crimps my style and slows me down, but I can't leave a staple in a page if it has no purpose. And there can't be more than one, especially if it's just a two or three-page document. It looks sloppy. It feels sloppy.

There's this company who sends me bills in duplicate. They staple the duplicate bills together, which makes no sense because if they're sending bills in duplicate because they're afraid one might get lost, well, both are going to get lost if they're stapled together. Dammit. Even worse, if there's a packing list, they'll staple that to the stapled duplicate pages. By the time they get all the double-stapled bills stuffed in the envelope, that's another forty-one cents to mail. Of all the geezly. Of all the Christly.

I like the sound of a staple being pulled neatly from the page. Clink. Clink. Clink. If it snags and the staple crimps, my rhythm is thrown off. God forbid if I have to attack the page with my fingers to get the staple out--it's as disruptive as writing with a pencil when the lead snaps.

If I’m in a hurry or in a bad mood, I’ll leave the staples in the pages. On purpose.

It fills me with guilt.
5 Did the Unhingey Jiggy Engage in Unhingenosity
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