How I get my groove on Sunday, April 12, 2009, 5:11 PM Ever suffered a near-death experience? Email me. Okay, so I'm still writing Twilight saga fan fiction because I have no life. Also, because I love vampires. One in  particular. Edward's so jam-packed of angst, feels like he's the worst thing ever born on earth, which understandably blinds him to his own worth. On top of this, he's in love and fighting bloodlust for the one he loves, and he's sexually untapped.Quick, pass me a Hershey candy bar before I pass out. I don't know why this particular character has affected me so strongly. (Quite a change from Michael Samuelle of La Femme Nikita, but they are both dangerous, beautiful inside, enigmatic, tormented and inhumanely sexy.) I've thought about it and I have some ideas, but that's not what this post is about. ahem I am a tender fuzzy peach being thrown against a brick wall--bruising, bruising, ow, bruising. I painfully-slow rip-roared through the dying scene (hah! a contradiction, yet it fits), but the rebirth is com. Pleee. Kated. I've never fought through agonizing pain of death to be reborn as a vampire. Yeah, you might as well be surprised! Trying to imagine it--to imagine fighting through all that crap to be reborn in an alien body--is giving me a not-so-wonderful complex. I thought this part would be child's play next to writing about death and watching someone you love suffer through it. Either that, or I'm doing something wrong, trying to imagine and feel something too hard or too much. So far, the best analogy I've been able to come up with is the time I woke up from one of my knee surgeries. It doesn't really count, though, because an anesthesiologist poked a needle into my spine to numb me the waist-frick-down, so I didn't feel any agony--just funked out confusion. But I still think I can still run with it because there was that sense of twisted pseudo reality I'm trying to convey. Wow, was it weird. And funny (but it can't be funny, the piece I'm writing can't be funny). Writing about a twisted kind of reality is hard. Writing well is hard. More than one person has told me this, but lah-lah-lah, I can't hear yah! I never wanted to believe them. Frick, writing was never HARD when I was growing up and didn't know diddly. Yeah, that was then. Writing is more than just spinning thoughts into words (it's gold-plated hell, okay?). I have to put myself into a certain dark frame of mind, which makes my body feel like the day after I've done 150 crunches and then chewed an entire pack of gum at once. It's nuts, especially since I'll never get paid for doing this. Can't stop loving it or doing it, though. Won't. Cant-wont. Labels: Twilight fan fiction  
Engage in Unhingenosity
Wish they had Draino for the brain After hemming and hawing, wracking my brains, dragging my feet, stopping and starting, growling and moaning over it for weeks, I finally hit my stride writing the next installment of A Forever Moment. It was such a happy relief. But then it got to be after eleven, and I had to stop writing and hit the sack. I've been looking forward to getting back to the piece all day. Now the words won't come. And man, is it FRUSTRATING. This is going to be the hardest thing I've ever written. [ insert foot stompage here ] Writing is hard. Why does it have to be so hard? Labels: Twilight, Twilight fan fiction
Engage in Unhingenosity
Saturday morning snapshot Arrested Development's Everyday People It's raining here in Los Angeles, but the sound is like someone taking a forever leak. It's just a drizzle and it keeps going and going, so I dreamed all night long about having to go pee. Very frustrating. But I won't complain (much) because it beats having a nightmare. On tap for today is housework and more writing. I've committed myself to writing onward on my piece called A Forever Moment. After I finish the pieces, I throw them up on fan fiction dot net, otherwise known as the writer's answer of instant gratification. I was iffy about doing this, but figured if I was writing Twilight fan fiction, there really wasn't any reason not to because I'm not just writing for me. Unlike my first fic, Unglued (my idea of the honeymoon scene), A Forever Moment isn't as successful. It hasn't got near the hits Unglued has (over 600 on ff.net and almost 2000 at Twilighted). More people have put me on writer alert so they'll be notified when I post again, but this piece? I get the feeling they read the first few sentences, gag and click off. Which really surprises the crap out of me because there are hundreds of honeymoon scenes out there (I didn't know this until after I wrote Unglued) and nothing that I've come across is like what I wrote about in AFM. I'll have a better idea once the story goes up on Twilighted, the inclusive, high-quality fan fiction site. *giggle* On Friday, I had to call the Lincoln Financial Group, which is based in Fort Wayne, where I grew up. I was so excited, you would have thought I'd just sucked in a balloon's helium. My question about how the weather was in Fort Wayne lead to all kinds of questions from the guy on the other end, and before I knew it, we were chatting like long lost friends. I learned he graduated in 1983, went to South Side, was married with two kids, one who was getting married next month in Beverly Hills...and was it really a three-and-a-half hour ride from the airport to Beverly Hills? Um, not unless they arrive in Burbank and miss that left turn at Albuquerque. Labels: Fort Wayne, Twilight fan fiction
Engage in Unhingenosity
Shaken  I was drowsing peacefully tonight when a small earthquake shook me awake. I didn't know what was happening at first because I was groggy, and then I did realize, and I bolted up and pulled on some socks. Because it's better to meet Fate with socks on in times like these, I think I thought at the time... So now I can't sleep, and I figured I might as well write (on my next Twilight fan fiction piece), only I'm having difficulty concentrating. This piece is a tough one because it reminds me of the paper I wrote on euthanasia in high school. I still have the paper--I read it yesterday--and it seemed as if I'd written it from arm's-length. I knew the definition well, I knew how to spell the word correctly, but I didn't understand what euthanasia meant at all. I can't believe I got an A on it. A few years ago, I saw a documentary about a man who was opting for mercy killing--he'd lost all his family and friends and was terminally ill. This program covered a year in his life as he went about seeking and interviewing with the doctor who would give him this release. It was depressing as hell and the closer the program got to the end, the more my insides shook. I couldn't watch the end. I was a wreck for days afterward--I just couldn't believe how strongly it had affected me. I understood his reasons for wanting to die, but I couldn't understand his resolve to see it through. And I couldn't understand how the doctor could end this man's life. But they were both utterly committed to seeing their plans through. Now I'm trying to write something similar for Bella and Edward and my insides are shaking. So I guess that's a good thing because it'll be real for me, it'll make me cry, it'll make me angry. And that usually translates well into words. Momma. And so here I am, drinking a cup of coffee after nine o'clock at night even though I have to work tomorrow. I'm going to stay up and write about death...and worry about earthquakes...because I'm still alive to do so. Yaay. Labels: Twilight fan fiction
Engage in Unhingenosity
Obsession personified Write fan fiction, of course. ~*~*~*~ If you haven't read Breaking Dawn yet and don't want to be spoiled, stop reading now.~*~*~*~ Ever since reading Breaking Dawn in August, I've felt cheated. Stephenie Meyer did a hair-yanking, pulse-pounding wonderful job (for me) fanning the slow burning build up of sexual tension between Edward and Bella during the first three books. Bella damn near faints after kissing Edward in Twilight. He gives her the first really dangerous kiss in New Moon. And then there's a body temperature raising scene involving hips in Eclipse. So like any hot-blooded girl with more imagination than sense, I was counting on the pay-off in Breaking Dawn. Hungering for it, okay? When that scene came, when Edward and Bella are finally naked and standing together in tropical water just a wee bumpy boat ride from the coast of Rio...Edward pulls her deeper into the water and the honeymoon scene goes white before anything goes down. !!! I've been fighting an irresistible compulsion to write their honeymoon scene ever since. I gave in to it two days ago. (Don't waste your time telling me how absurd I am for writing fan fiction. Trust me, I already know.) The piece, which is called Unglued, is a oneshot because it's just one chapter and covers one scene/one moment, is just over 3500 words. I had such a blast writing it. I squealed, I giggled, I cried. I buried my face in my hands. I had to take my socks off because I got so hot. And, well, I haven't felt those kind of emotions as a writer in far too long. So I haven't been writing here, but I have been writing and I feel all yaay-times-one-hundred about that. Now that my first piece is done, I'm itching to write another. I guess Bella and Edward and the rest of the Cullens aren't going anywhere for a while... Labels: Twilight, Twilight fan fiction
Engage in Unhingenosity
|
::Unhinged::
::Behind Unhinged::
::Unhinged Currently:: 
::Faves::
::Writerly Links:: if you don't risk anything, you risk even more. ~Erica Jong Holly Lisle Book Angst Contract Lingo Criticism Newbie's Guide to Publishing Slush Killer Story Telling Touch Graph Urban Dictionary Whatever Bartleby Grammar Guide Name Nerds Free Word Thesaurus Time and Date Word Navigator Writer's Edge Writing Articles ::Unhinged Reads::
::Unhinged of Yesterday::
::Still here? ::
 Raw evil score: 31.11% 
 |